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Make Your Mark (5 Steps to Achieving Your Wildest Dreams)
have you ever tossed aside your dream because you felt they weren't achievable? Or that it was silly and unrealistic?
I have.
I'm sure we all have. From childhood dreams to different things we wanted to do, to be, our dreams sometimes are pushed aside, giving way to things that are more "realistic".
Recently I was listening is a podcast episode about Alexis Pappas, an Olympian who has achieved many audacious dreams before she was 30 years old - author, film maker, and representing Greece at the 2016 Olympics.
It makes me feel like a slob, but here is a gem she shared from her Olympic coach that I would love for all of you to know:
The Rule of Thirds
“When you’re chasing a dream, or doing anything hard, you’re meant to feel good a third of the time, okay a third of the time, and crappy a third of the time. If the ratio is roughly in that range, then you’re doing fine. So, today was the crappy day along your dream chasing. If the ratio is off and you feel too good all of the time or too bad then you gotta look at if you’re fatiguing or not trying hard enough or pushing yourself.”
Pay attention to that ratio and if it's roughly a third, a third, a third, you have found the right balance pursuing your dream.
BASE PRINCIPLE
When you are chasing your dreams, 1/3 of the time should feel good, 1/3 of the time should feel ok, and 1/3 of the time should feel crappy.
WHAT IF?
What if you could achieve your wildest dreams? What if anything you set your mind to, you could accomplish? What if you knew the steps to getting what you wanted?
While doing research on how people have achieved their biggest dreams, I came across numerous tips and lessons. One was from Peter H. Diamandis, the founder of the X-Prize, Singularity University, Human Longevity Inc., and more. What struck me was that 80% of what I read was about honing your mindset and 20% was about taking action.
It doesn't mean taking action is not important, it just means that so much of why we don't achieve our dreams are the limitations we place on ourselves.
Here is a five step strategy to achieving our wildest dreams:
Step 1: Define and commit to your dream
According to research by Dr. Gail Matthews at Dominican University, you are 42% more likely to achieve your goals when you write them down. Be concrete and specific.
What will happen in five years?
Who will you become?
Why is this dream important to you?
Are you willing to make tough choices to for this dream to come true?
Make sure this is YOUR dream, not someone else's dream for you. When it's yours, it turns from a should to a MUST.
Step 2: Protect it from everyone (including yourself)
"That's unrealistic."
"That's never going to happen."
"You are just setting yourself up for failure and rejection."
Whether they are from friends, family, or even yourself, big dreams will have negative reactions and naysayers. At this stage, your big dream has a small voice. It will be drowned out if you let it, so protect your dreams from them. If you find your own voice drowning your dreams, stop. Know that a critical component of achieving big dreams is you becoming that person who WILL achieve it. You have no idea who you will become yet, so tell your current self "Just you wait."
Step 3: Find evidence and use emotion
Look for people who have achieved their wildest dreams. Find stories and analogs who are closest to what you are trying to do. (e.g. I want to be an ultra-athlete, but I'm in my forties. Guess what? Rich Roll did exactly that, became one of the best ultra-athletes in 2 years starting from almost zero and started when he was forty.)
Like it or not, one of the biggest motivators is revenge. Barbara Corcoran, the Shark Tank star and real estate mogul credits an insult from her ex-husband for her success. He was also her business partner at the time and when he left Barbara for their secretary, he said "You will never succeed without me." Those words burned a desire and motivation for Barbara - she was ready to overcome anything. Don't dwell on negativity, but use it as fuel ✊🏽
Step 4: Plot a path with milestones
From a five year vision, to a three year, one year, and a 30 day plan, plot down your targets and what you will do to move towards that dream.
Much of achieving your dreams is being incredibly good at certain skills, what are the habits and reps that you need to get there? One of the hardest things when trying to achieve something is that sometimes it's hard to know if you are getting better, so if you can't measure the results, measure the reps. (e.g. I want to be a world class podcast interviewer, can I commit to studying questions from the top 100 podcast hosts? What about interviewing 500 people?)
Do it enough times that it would be unreasonable for you to suck.
~ Alex Hormozi
Step 5: Take action immediately
Last, but certainly not least is to do something NOW. Don't wait on pursuing your dreams. A commitment to action is critical. Don't wait for the new year, the new month, the Monday after. This should be something you can do in the next hour to make immediate progress. (e.g. Call your friends, research a topic, schedule a meeting)
I am so excited for you to make your mark, to achieve your dreams as I work towards achieving mine. As I write this, I am reminded of former palliative carer - Bonnie Ware, where she shared the No. 1 regret people have about their lives: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” You have one life, go pursue your wildest dreams.
I leave you with this quote:
“Believe in your dreams and they may come true. Believe in yourself and they will surely come true.”
~ Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
Live your legend 🤘🏽,
Howie Chan
Creator of Legend Letters
Sources:
Stillman, Jessica, Use This Olympian's Rule of Thirds to Chase Any Big Dream, Inc.com - LINK
Diamandis, Peter H., Turn Your Dreams Into Plans, March 27, 2022 - LINK
Forleo, Marie, Dream Big: 5 Research-Backed Ways to Achieve Your Most “Unrealistic” Dreams, March 14, 2017 - LINK
Mikel, Betsy, Barbara Corcoran: This Insult Was The Best Advice I Ever Received. It's The Reason I'm Successful Today, Inc.com - LINK