How to Instantly Create Connection With Anyone

One of the most important insights about influencing human behavior we so often forget is that we are emotional creatures who can think, not thinking beings who have emotions.

To influence anyone, you first need to connect with the person emotionally. ❤️ Start with the heart.

And one of the best ways to do that? 

Tell stories. 

But most people approach story in the wrong way. They think: what is MY story? What is MY lesson? What do I want to teach?

My deep conversation with Karen Eber taught me something crucial: 

🧠 A great story doesn’t start with your idea, it starts with your audience.

And the fastest way to hook them?

Give them a character they instantly recognize. This is where the Muppet Model comes in (yes, you heard it right… muppets.)

(Karen Eber is a globally recognized storytelling expert and CEO of Eber Leadership Group, with over 20 years leading culture and leadership at companies like GE, Deloitte, and Microsoft. Her TED Talk on how the brain responds to stories has more than 2.5 million views from Ted.com and YouTube combined. Her bestselling book The Perfect Story has won multiple top business book awards. Backed by neuroscience and real-world results, Karen’s work helps leaders connect, influence, and drive lasting change through the power of story.) 

🧰 The Muppet Model

The idea is that all muppets can be categorized as order muppets or chaos muppets:

Order muppets crave structure, they think in logical, linear steps. Rows and columns. You know these muppets: Kermit, Beaker, Scooter

– Systems people. Love structure, clarity, checklists.
– Tidy desks. Tidy lives. Color-coded vacations.
– Most execs, engineers, ops folks, project managers.

Chaos muppets? You can probably guess. They thrive in the whirlwind, they think in non-linear ways. Some of these muppets: Animal, Miss Piggy, the Chef.

– Vibes people. Love energy, vision, emotions.
– Inspired mess. “Pile it, don’t file it” Drama. Magic.
– Many creatives, founders, and front-of-room leaders.

Can you identify as an order or chaos muppet?

Good (I’m definitely more of a chaos muppet 😅)

When you build your story around a character who is immediately recognizable as an order or chaos muppet, something happens in the brain:

“That’s me.”
“That’s my boss.”
“That’s my client.”

You’ve triggered instant emotional recognition. (The trick is to be as specific and as unique as you can in your description.)

Now they care. 

So if I wanted to tell you a story to convince you that personal branding is important, here is how I’ll start:

Once I had a client. Let’s call him Dave. Dave was a senior director of operations. He dreams in spreadsheets. He is the type of person who can’t take a vacation without using pivot tables. He’s even succeeded in breaking down his fear of flying into rows and columns. So when I started talking about brand being a feeling and perception, guess what his face looked like?

Were you hooked? Did you immediately connect to the story? “Dave sounds like me!” or “I know a Dave!”

Why does it work? 🧠 

1. Pattern Recognition Lights Up the Brain

When you describe a character as an “Order Muppet” or “Chaos Muppet,” the brain immediately activates stored schemas: mental shortcuts from past experiences. This triggers faster comprehension and stronger connection.

2. Mirror Neurons Enable Emotional Simulation

When the audience sees themselves (or someone they know) in a character, mirror neurons fire, allowing them to feel the character’s emotions and journey as if it were their own.

3. Emotional Resonance Enhances Memory Encoding

Recognizable characters paired with emotional detail activate the amygdala and hippocampus, leading to long-term memory formation. We remember people like us more than abstract ideas.

4. Cognitive Ease Builds Trust

The Muppet Model reduces complexity. Recognizable archetypes create cognitive fluency, which the brain experiences as truth and credibility. The easier it is to “get” a character, the easier it is to trust the message. 

TL;DR Muppet Model Science

1. Familiarity is detected. ("I've seen this before!")

2. Simulation kicks in. ("I’m feeling this.")

3. Emotion locks memory. ("I’ll remember this.")

4. Trust increases. ("I believe this.")

The next time you tell a story, don’t forget to use the Muppet Model, instant emotional connection.

Want more?

Listen to Karen and I talk about everything story. She shares this ONE trap that most people fall into when telling stories. (Listen on the web, Apple, Spotify and anywhere you get your podcasts.) I also extracted 10 lessons from our episode HERE.)

Make your mark, live your legend 🤘🏽

I’ll see you on Wednesday (Influence Science will now come on Wednesdays! 👏🏽)

Howie Chan

Creator of Legend Letters

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